This story starts with a cracked tooth. No need to wince—it cracked one summer day, but then caused me no more trouble.
However, that next winter, my work situation snowballed into one of the toughest periods of my life. What had been a dream job abruptly became a nightmare. Upper management went through a shift in thinking, which was directly affecting my project. My team, who I cared deeply about, became confused and disoriented even as we tried to comfort each other and adjust. As manager, I felt responsible for the outcome. The stress was wiping me out and lowering all my defenses.
And right in the middle of this, my tooth decided to flare up.
At first I tried to handle it from a strictly physical point of view. No go. The pain, unfortunately, kept increasing. It became the focus of my world, I couldn't even think about work anymore. I went to a local dentist who informed me there was an infection and the tooth couldn't come out until the infection was gone. He prescribed antibiotics and painkillers, told me how I could clean the area, and sent me home.
When I got the prescription filled, the person behind the counter told me when I was on this medication, I wouldn't be able to "operate heavy machinery," meaning I couldn't drive. But I had an important family trip the next day that couldn't be cancelled. I had to be able to drive.
So I took the pills home and stuffed them in a drawer. If the pain was simply from an infection, I felt I could deal with that through my spiritual connect. I'd seen a healing of infection before without medication, so I was convinced it could happen again. I also did the cleaning the dentist recommended.
It was at this point that I also finally began to address what was the real root of the problem—the work stress. I had many significant conversations with family members and in-the-know work associates who were supportive and understanding. I drew on this support for a growing conviction that despite all appearances, all was well. God, Spirit, was in control. Of me, of my tooth, of work. I was not spinning somewhere outside of His control.
And His control was Love. My subordinates were also enveloped in that Love, which had always motivated all that we were doing and had the power to protect us now.
Throughout these several days, I had bouts with pain but also painless, Love-filled moments. When the pain was gone, I knew only a deep connection with Spirit. I'd use these breaks to shore up my defenses as much as possible with heightened prayer and conviction. I began to feel a sense of control over the pain as I specifically addressed both the physical and mental symptoms. I don't want this to sound like it was easy, because it wasn't, but it was productive and inspiring. I felt that God was with me.
We took the family trip, me driving most of the way, and it worked out. The kids had a great time anyway and I even got some rest. Within a few days after the trip, the pain eased off and disappeared. I took this to mean the infection was healed.
When the tooth removal date came, the dentist remarked that he was glad the antibiotics had worked, and I told him I'd never taken them. He extracted the tooth fairly easily (yes, at that point I used Novocain!), and a continued discipline of prayer and connection to Sprit in the aftermath made the healing process happen harmoniously. No further complications.
This experience strengthened me to face the work situation with more equanimity. I recognized I had been allowing the stress to affect me. I'd let it in, thinking something had changed for the worst. This was the real "infection." As I grew in my understanding that nothing good could be lost, that nothing had changed in reality and that my team and I were safe and loved and appreciated by Spirit, I felt a renewed harmony in the workplace. When my project ended shortly thereafter and I moved on to other things, I was actually grateful. My subordinates, too, made transitions that were completely right for them.
Moral of the story? If there's any moral, it's that we're holistic beings. We can't separate out physical wellbeing from emotional and spiritual. I needed to learn that harmony in one area supported harmony in another—that I am one, whole, loved child of the Creator, and that Creator adjusts things perfectly on all levels.
I lost a lot of fear in those two weeks, and gained a lot of Love.
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